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Unconfirmed reports from an eastern Algarve course describe the recent experience of one of their members. Heading for the car park after his round, he was approached by a GNR police officer who spoke in perfect English. The officer informed him that his drive out of bounds at the sixteenth hole had smashed into a passing vehicle resulting in a six car pile-up.

When the golfer was asked what he proposed to do about this, he thought carefully before replying, “I’ll need to open my stance a little, loosen my grip and lower my right thumb.” We stress this report remains unconfirmed!